Welcome loyal readers, to another edition of YouChoose Reviews. This week’s winner was ECW Cyberslam 99, beating out two WWE titles in Summerslam 2000 and Vengeance 2006. Per usual, I’ll pull three titles from the box at random and you’ll have the opportunity to vote for which one you’d like to see me review next. The winner gets reviewed and the two losers get tossed back into the box. All of that action will take place right after tonight’s review! What more could you want in life? I’M LETTING YOU FUCKING CHOOSE!

CYBERSLAM 1999

Joey Styles, accompanied by a large ECW chant, is standing in the ring to open the show. He says that they’re in Philly and the crowd pops. With that we head to the ECW video package. I’m glad this made the cut. Really.

JERRY LYNN vs. YOSHIHIRO TAJIRI
Well this should be fun. Both men get a decent pop during introductions but Lynn’s was noticeably and expectedly larger. Lynn attempts to ground Tajiri early by diving at his legs. PSYCHOLOGY~! Tajiri quickly gets himself out of that mess and we procceed to get some quick back and forth mat wrestling. I’m sorry for being so vague on that one but my fingers couldn’t keep up. I think reviewing XPW Freefall had an adverse effect on my recapping skills. I’ll pull through. Don’t worry about me. Just enjoy the review. Tajiri rolls to the outside and Lynn nails a plancha from the top turnbuckle. Lynn rolls back in and panders to the crowd for a hot minute. Tajiri interupts that shit and locks on the tarantula. He follows up with his trademark flipping back elbow. Back to the outside. Tajiri throws Lynn over the guard rail and into the crowd. He jumps up on to the ring apron and hits a nice moonsault. Tajiri rolls back in and doesn’t look winded a bit. Tajiri goes for a suplex but Lynn reverses it into an inverted DDT for two. These two work well together. Tajiri gets up and hits a couple of stiff kicks. Jerry asks for more and Tajiri knocks the shit out of him. If I took anything from that, it’s to not ask Tajiri for more. Lynn recovers quickly and gets Tajiri in the corner. STIFF CHOPS! Tajiri escapes and attacks with his own flurry of equally stiff chops. I won’t capitilize Tajiri’s stiff chops due to the risk of using caps lock too often. Lynn gives Tajiri a sick running powerbomb for two. Tajiri lands on his feet off of a belly to back suplex and dropkicks Lynn’s left knee. Roll up! 1… 2… Lynn gets his foot on the ropes! A nice clothesline puts Lynn back on offence and he finishes Tajiri off with a cradle piledriver.

This was the perfect choice for an opener. They got the crowd into the show, they didn’t slow down for a minute, and all of the moves were crisp. That’s pretty much the definition of what an opening match should be. Quibbles? Well of course I have a few, but they’re minor I assure you. I wish it was given another five to ten minutes. Doesn’t every internet writer say that about a good match cut short though? Also, I wish there was more psychology. The match didn’t have much substance to it. Again, what critic wouldn’t want that though? These two performed to the best of their abilities and fulfilled the obligations that accompany wrestling the opening match. ***1/4

Lance Storm comes down to the ring and calls out Tommy Dreamer. Apparently Tommy Dreamer has been claiming that Storm is on steroids. Storm quickly denies it and calls everybody in the audience fat. After a quick glance, I can’t dispute that. Lance has some urine in a vile and says that he’s willing to get it tested. He also has an empty vile and asks Tommy to come out and publicly urinate to prove that he’s never juiced. Tommy gets in the ring and Lance attacks! Tommy ducks a punch and hits a DDT. He grabs Lance Storm’s urine from Dawn Maries and pours it on Storm. The crowd liked it, it kept an injured Tommy Dreamer on screen, and it was quick and inoffensive.

NOVA vs. ROD PRICE
Rod Price hits some extremely limited and unimpressive big man offense to start the match off. The camera catches Nova asking him to powerslam him. Rod follows up with a powerslam. Nova gets on offence and hits a clothesline off the top. Nova hits the ropes and Skull Von Krush (aka Big Vito) pulls him to the outside and starts pummeling him. Chris Chetti attacks Skull to even the odds. Price hits Nova with a chair and Nova rolls to the inside. Skull and Price double team Chetti on the outside which gives Nova a chance to recover. Chetti gets in the ring and hits a springboard plancha on to Skull while Nova follows up with a suicide dive on to Price. Nova rolls Price to the inside. They hit an Event Omega off of the same turnbuckle and Nova pins Rod Price for the win. Skull and Price argue in the ring post match. Skull Von Krush gets the best of Price with a nice swinging DDT.

This was a quick and fun little encounter. It fell pretty flat in terms of match quality but I enjoyed watching it as a fan. Paul Heyman was smart enough to book around Price’s inadequecies and while Price didn’t come off looking like a million dollars, he didn’t come out of the match looking like a piece of shit either. Fun Filler. 3/4*

SUPER CRAZY vs. MOSCO DE LA MERCED
This isn’t going to be easy to recap. We get some typical armdrag variations to start the match before Super Crazy rolls to the outside. He rolls back in and we get reversal after reversal after reversal, That sequence ends in a stale mate. Crazy goes back to the outside and Mosco jumps off of the second rope and hits a flipping senton to the outside and lands on his feet. Crazy throws Mosco into the crowd and hits the Crazy Special off of the top rope! This is fast paced. I’ve probably missed a move or two I apologize for that. Back inside and Super Crazy hits a second rope moonsault for two. He hits a top rope moonsault this time and gets another two. The crowd is digging this. Mosco goes upstairs and hits a tilt-a-whirl hurricanrana. Super Crazy rolls to the outside and Mosco hits a slingshot sommersault plancha! Thank God for Joey Styles giving me the names to some of these moves. Mosco rolls him in and gets a two count. Mosco’s moves are a little sloppy for the record. He can keep up a good pace but he doesn’t hit his moves with the precision of somebody like Super Crazy. Crazy throws Mosco into the crowd and hits a moonsault off of the guard rail! He rolls Mosco inside and goes upstairs. He misses a splash off the top and Mosco gets a two count. TOO MANY ROLL UPS! Mosco ends the roll up session with a stiff clothesline and Super Crazy kicks out at two. Mosco goes upstairs and hits a TWISTING 450 SPLASH! Joey didn’t even have a name for that one. Mosco goes for a moonsault but Super Crazy kicks him in the face! He picks him up and hits a MASSIVE powerbomb but only gets two! He goes back upstairs but Mosco runs up the ropes and somehow ends up powerbombing Super Crazy off of the top rope! Super Crazy kicks out of a pinning predicament and ends up with the upper hand again. He hits a backbreaker and nails a frog splash for the win.

These two threw everything they had at each other and it was just a blast to watch. Mosco was a bit sloppy at times and I think Super Crazy could have done the same match better with somebody else. Also, after all of those flashy moves, I wish Super Crazy would have finished the match off with something a little better than a frog splash, but it’s not a big deal in the big scheme of things. **3/4

TAKA MICHINOKU vs. PAPI CHULO
This should be another good match. These two had a pretty solid outing at Wrestlemania 14, when Papi wrestled under a mask and was known as Aguila. He’d later end up back in the WWE as Essa Rios.The crowd’s firmly behind Taka here. Chulo misses with a dropkick and gets backdropped to the outside. Taka hits a springboard plancha and rolls back inside to soak up the crowd response. Chulo rolls in and gets a dropkick to the face. Taka gives him a backbreaker and then puts him in a single leg crab. We’re only like one minute in and all of that shit just happened. Taka delivers some chops. Chulo breaks free and grabs Taka’s arm. He holds on to it and runs the top rope with a sweet looking armdrag. He goes upstairs and misses a 450. Taka goes up but Chulo stalls him and hits a hurricanrana. TWO! Taka takes control back quickly and hits a DDT off of the top rope for two. That’s been my biggest problem with all of these matches. There’s little to no transition between offence and defense. Taka goes for a frogsplash but gets dropkicked and before I’m done typing that sentence Taka is back in control. I’m a fast typer for the record. Holy Shit! Taka’s on the outside and Chulu hits a sommersault plancha OVER THE RINGPOST to the outside. After some recovery time Taka is back in control. He goes for the Michinoku Driver but only gets two! Chulo rolls him up but only gets two! Taka misses a beautiful moonsault but again, only gets two! Taka hits the Michinoku Driver into an inverted suplex and it’s over!

Wow! This match didn’t stop for a second! These two went balls to the wall and it turned out to be one hell of a match. They took the flash from Crazy/Mosco and the intensity from Lynn/Tajiri and created one hell of a spotfest. With three matches of this caliber/genre on the show, each match had to go out of it’s way to stand out. Crazy/Mosco was one step below Lynn/Tajiri and Taka/Chulo was just as good, though not comparable at all. Which is a good thing. ***1/4

ECW TV TITLE MATCH: 2 COLD SCORPIO vs. ROB VAN DAM (c)
We start off with some vintage RVD stalling. Fonzie is being as annoying as possible at ringside which is always a plus. They feel each other out with some arm bars and such. RVD finally gets him down and hits a spinning leg drop. Scorpio gets back to his feet and we get another stand off. They feel each other out some more and RVD hits a shoulder block. RVD taunts some more. Scorpio hits a nice underhook suplex and then kicks RVD in the jaw. Basically these two are going back and forth hitting their signature moves at an average pace. Scorpio signals for a 450 splash and hits a double armed DDT. Oh. Looks like there’s more time left than he originally thought. RVD gets up and Scorpio hits a stiff yet mis-timed super kick. Scorpio hits a nice suplex with a lateral press for two. RVD hits a leg lariat to get back on offence. I think that 2 Cold Scorpio just had the longest amount of sustained offence thus far on the show. Scorpio rolls to the outside and RVD throws him into the crowd. RVD hits a plancha into the crowd. I’m numb to that move already. This is the fourth match with that spot in it. These guys should really get together in the back and pull spots out of a hat or something. RVD rolls him in for a two count. He hits the rolling thunder, a tumbling senton in 1999, for another two count. He goes upstairs and Scorpio hits a belly to back suplex off the top rope! He goes back up and hits a Houston Hangover. He calls for the 450 again and this time drops him with a Samoan Drop. Finally he goes upstairs and doesn’t even go for the 450. Oh, come on! I’m starting to think he just likes doing the 450 signal a whole lot. He hits a frog splash for two. Scorpio’s getting frustrated now and throws RVD to the outside. Scorpio hits a running big boot and now he’s setting up a table. One end is on the guard rail and one end is on the ring apron. He rolls RVD onto the table. He rolls into the ring and dashes towards the ropes but has to put on the brakes as RVD rolls off of the table. RVD rolls into the ring and Scorpio follows him in with a chair. He hits him with some weak looking chairshots and the crowd is shitting on them. He lays the chair on Van Dam’s head and leg drops the chair! That shut the crowd up. 1… 2… NO! SABU’S HERE! Sabu ambushes Scorpio on the outside and rolls him on to the table. He sets the chair up in the ring and hits an air Sabu off of it, putting Scorpio through the table. A “holy shit” chant ensues. Fonzie is pissed at Sabu for risking his health as Sabu has a fractured jaw. RVD rolls Scorpio back in on top of the chair. He hits a leg drop on Scorpio but only gets two. They trade off waist locks and that ends in Scorpio connecting with a powerbomb. TWO! Scorpio goes upstairs but Fonzie crotches him. Fonzie holds a chair up to Scorpio’s face and Van Dam hits a top turnbuckle Van Daminator. He finishes with the Five Star Frog Splash!

This was a typical Rob Van Dam match and that’s not a bad thing. There’s always room on a card for a match like this. Both men looked good in there. They got a little hardcore while still maintaining their natural athleticism and storytelling, it advanced the Scorpio/Sabu feud, and it gave RVD another win to legitimize his reign even more. It also bridged the gap between the lightweight matches and the heavyweight matches too, which is something you don’t see very often. It seamlessly changed the direction of the matches on the card. Very good booking there. Though it was a bit messy at times, it was a solid encounter. **3/4

ECW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: TAZ (c) vs. CHRIS CANDIDO
Candido is accompanied by Tammy Sytch and Steve Corino. Before the match, Candido cut a promo saying he’s never tapped out to anything or anybody and tells Taz he wants this match to be FTW rules. Apparently ECW rules are too strict for Candido. The match starts off with some cookie cutter brawling. They head into the crowd and Candido knocks Taz down with a hard elbow. He runs into the ring, heads to the top rope and you’ll never guess what happens next… He hits a plancha into the crowd! OH MY GOD! Like I said earlier, they really could have used a spot raffle before this show. They’re brawling through the crowd, exchanging punches, and I’m not going to go into detail about it unless something cool happens. They brawl back to the ringside area, and Candido gingerly throws Taz through the time keeper’s table. Of course it breaks in half. Back into the crowd now and Taz ducks a punch and hits a nice T-Bone suplex on the concrete.1… 2… No! Falls count anywhere in FTW rules by the way. Candido knocks Taz down and hits an elbow off of a balcony. Only a two count for that. He rolls him into the ring and hits a nice looking verticle suplex. That only gets two as well. Candido goes back upstairs and hits a diving headbutt for another two. Candido follows up with a slingshot belly to back suplex for ANOTHER two. This match just isn’t clicking for me. Taz begins to mount a comeback with a couple of suplex variations but Candido hits a thumb to the eye followed by a powerbomb to regain dominance. Candido sets up for the top rope powerbomb. Taz reverses that into a Taz-plex off of the second turnbuckle. Sytch gives Candido a chain! Punch to the face! 1… 2… NO! Candido’s looking under the ring for something. He finds what he’s looking for and it’s a table. He slides it into the ring and sets it up in the corner. Taz reverses an irish whip into a Tazmission and suplexes him into the table. The ref calls for the bell and Candido’s pointing to his neck. They apply a neck brace and put him on a stretcher. The crowd chants “fuck you Taz” as Candido gets taken to the back. Taz pulls him off of the stretcher, beats the shit out of him, and then proceeds to choke the shit out of him. If you’re keeping track, all of the shit is pretty much out of Candido at this point. The crowd eats it up and it’s a good way to end the segment.

This match wasn’t very good. It had a very typical heavyweight match layout: Brawl through the crowd for the first half and hit a bunch of power moves for the second half. With some weapons thrown in for good measure of course. These two were capable of doing a lot more than that. The match was actually beginning to pick up a little steam down the stretch too, but then we got an abrupt non-finish. Looking at this match on paper, I expected it to be a lot better than it was. **

SHANE DOUGLAS vs. JUSTIN CREDIBLE
Speaking of matches on paper… This one doesn’t look very good. Shane Douglas is in the ring with Francine and cuts a typical Shane Douglas promo. Shane draws an invisible line down the middle of the ring and tells Justin to cross it if he’s a man. Justin crosses it and gets slapped like a bitch. The bell rings and they begin exchanging chops. Jason and Jazz are ringside with Credible. Jazz is only an unnamed woman at this point. Douglas hits a nice suplex, floats over, hits another, floats over and hits a third! He gets a two count, lifts Credible up, and gives him a facebuster followed by a running inverted neck snap for two. He’s going to be blown up quick if he keeps trying to go at this pace. Credible slows the pace down with some chops. Douglas fights back with some chops of his own. They head to the outside and Douglas pulls out a table after a little bit of brawling. He slides that into the ring. He tosses Justin into the guard rail and sets the table up in the ring while Justin recovers. He rolls him into the ring and lays him on the table. Douglas goes upstairs but Jazz grabs his foot and Justin tosses Shane through the table. 1… 2… No! More chopping ensues and I’m bored. Justin Credible hits a superkick but only gets two. Scoop slam and an elbow by Credible gets two. Two and a half according to Joey. I disagree with that but lets move on. Credible locks on a headlock and Shane quickly fights out of that. He tries to get some momentum but gets clothelined back down. He rolls to the outside and they’re brawling again. Douglas is busted open but that doesn’t stop him from getting involved in another chop battle! Hey, it works for Flair. Justin locks in a headlock for an extended period of time and Jazz slides a table into the ring. Justin sets the table up into the corner. Douglas reverses an irish whip and manages to powerslam him into the table. That only gets a two count. Douglas locks on the Figure Four. Jazz comes in and breaks it up! Francine attacks her and we have our catfight, Justin pulls Francine off Jazz and is about to hit her with a singapore cane but Douglas comes from behind and hits him with a singapore cane! I have no idea where these canes came from. Cane battle! Credible goes for the home run swing but Credible hits a dropkick to the face and now. Jason (who has a fractured neck) gets in the ring and is about to hit the Douglas with a cane but Francine spears him! She’s about to hit Jason with a cane but Douglas stops her. Douglas does it himself. Justin Credible sneaks up from behind and hits a superkick for two! Roll up by Justin only gets two! Credible goes for an axehandle but gets caught in an atomic drop. Douglas hits the Pittsburgh Plunge for three and Lance Storm hits the ring immediately to jump Douglas. Storm and Credible beat down Douglas and Dreamer hits the ring to even the odds. That ends up being an epic fail as Credible and Storm end up beating the shit out of him.

To be honest with you, I didn’t hate it. I’ve heard a lot of people say some bad things about this match but all in all, I don’t think the criticism is fair. It was a solid match with some decent booking involved. Nothing more, nothing less really. **

STEEL CAGE MATCH: THE DUDLEY BOYS & MUSTAPHA SAED vs NEW JACK, AXL ROTTEN & BALLS MAHONEY
Bubba Ray cuts a promo before the match saying that New Jack decided he wasn’t going to get involved in this match. Joel Gertner begins to do his awesome introductions but Bubba Ray cuts him off because it’s not the time for jokes tonight. He’s all business. Mahoney gets in the cage first and D-Von slowly follows suit. I guess this is going to be held under Wargame rules. The cage is closed and the bell rings. A table, a garbage can, and a couple other weapons are visible on the inside of the cage. They’re going to need them. Some punch/kick brawling ensues for a few minutes. D-Von is the first wrestler to eat steel. After a few punches and a very obvious blade job, D-Von is busted wide open. Balls hits him with a cookie sheet and delivers a splash from the top rope. The ring announcer begins counting down from ten. Bubba’s the next to enter. Double team on Balls. Yeah, I said it. He manages to hold them off for quite awhile before succombing to the odds. Axl Rotten is the next to enter and the odds have been evened. Axl Rotten begins grinding barbed wire on D-Von. The amount of blood coming out of D-von is actually kind of sick. Axl takes out a pair of scissors and begins CARVING into D-Vons forehead. That’s fucking sick. Bubba Ray hits Axl with a trash can lid and that gives D-Von a chance to grab the Scissors and carve away at Axl. Mustapha is in now and The Dudley’s team again has the advantage. D-Von and Axl are bleeding all over each other. The countdown for New Jack takes place but his music doesn’t go off. The Dudley’s begin to laugh and continue the beatdown. New Jack is here! He runs down with a garbage can full of weapons. His entrance music doesn’t stop and he begins beating the shit out of everybody to the beat of the song. Everybody’s bleeding except New Jack and everybody’s just kind of standing around while he does his thing. Axl has a bag of thumbtacks. He attempts to suplex D-Von on to them but D-Von reverses that and suplexes Axl onto them. More brawling ensues. Mustafa hits New Jack with a guitar. Balls blows fire into the face of Mustapha! The Dudley’s give Balls the 3D and double pin him for the win! After the match Axl and Balls put Mustafa on a table and New Jack climbs to the top of the cage and gives him a HUGE Splash. New Jacks head was in the rafters there. The faces celebrate as the show ends.

Well it was exactly what you expected. Nothing more and nothing less. There was blood, there were weapons, and New Jack was involved in a high spot. It was pretty boring for the most part but there were some bright spots. Once the weapons came into play, it became a bit more entertaining. If you like to watch fifteen minutes of mindless/uninspired brawling than this is for you. **

FINAL VERDICT: Overall I’d have to say this was a pretty good show. It had wrestling for the pure fans and wrestling for the hardcore crowd. I’d recommend tracking this DVD down and giving the show a watch. It’s a pretty fun experience as a whole. If you don’t track it down though (which I doubt you will), I’d at least give Chulo/Taka and Lynn/Tajiri a watch. I’m sure you know how to find them. 7/10

Well it’s that time once again. What time you ask? It’s time for YOU TO CHOOSE. I’ll choose three shows at random and you guys get to comment and vote on what you want me to review next! Here’s this week’s choices!

WWE New Years Revolution 2006
TNA Best Of The Bloodiest Brawls: Volume One
ROH Road To The Title (2004)

This should be a fun one! The current big three face off in this week’s YouChoose Poll! Vote, vote, vote, and I’ll see you in a week! (Possibly in a few days if you’re lucky.)

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Posted by Mike Bagozzi on December 18th, 2010 :: Filed under Reviews

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Welcome to the third edition of YouChoose Reviews everybody! Well, technically it’s the first edition because I’ve never referred to it as such before today. I had been considering it and made the decision to run with it about a week ago. It’s ironic that I name it that on this particular day though because you DIDN’T choose what I’d be reviewing today.

In short, I own a snowplowing company. The roads are shit crazy here and I’ve been shit busy. (I realize “shit busy” isn’t a phrase but go with it. I like it and it’d make me seem more legit if you pretended to like it and told all of your friends about it.) So, I’m going to post a review for No Mercy 2007 because, simply put, I already have it typed up. Expect to see the winner of last week’s poll reviewed and possibly some Raw thoughts tomorrow. Also, please notice my pretty new way of organizing my reviews. I’m separating my match synopsis from the actual play-by-play to make it easier on the eyes. And you said I didn’t care about you… Enough with the intro though. On with the review!

NO MERCY 2007

Vince McMahon and William Regal are on their way down to the ring as the show starts. William Regal was general manager of Raw at this point and doing an awesome job at it. Vince announces that John Cena suffered a debilitating injury on Raw and therefore will be unable to compete. The crowd goes crazy for that. He guarantees that there will be a new champion crowned tonight and that history will be made. He says that he’s going to give us what we want. The crowd begins a Y2J chant and Vince tells us that that’s not what we really want. Ha, I love heel Vince. He awards the championship to Randy Orton, who comes down to the ring and poses with the title for a lengthy amount of time. He proceeds to give a long acceptance speech before Triple H interrupts. Triple H asks for the title shot and gets turned down instantly. Triple H continues on and talks a bunch of shit to Vince for a few minutes. His punishment? A WWE championship match.

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: TRIPLE H vs. RANDY ORTON (c)
The match starts off with some back and forth brawling. Orton tries to get counted out but Triple H catches up with him and throws him back into the ring. Hey, it’s always worth a shot. Orton gets hit with a knee to the face but quickly recovers and hits his inverted back breaker to get on offense. Orton and Triple H get into a battle of punches accompanied by boo’s and yeah’s from the crowd. That’s always fun. Orton gets the best of Triple H in that battle, kicks Triple H a few times and slaps on a headlock. Vintage Orton! The fact that he’s aware of how much people hate his rest-holds make them even better. Triple H breaks out of that, sends Orton into the ropes and hits a HUGE clothesline! Triple H hits a superplex off the top rope but only gets a two count. Both guys are hitting their signature moves now and trading nearfalls. Triple H goes for the pedigree but Orton reverses it into a back body drop! Orton takes a quick breather, walks towards him and Triple H trips him! He locks on the figure-four but Orton gets a rope break. Triple H gets a roll up and that’s it! We have a new champion!

These guys already had the crowd in their pocket due to the atmosphere created by an impromptu championship match opening the show. They hit all of their signature spots, worked at a decent pace and kept it entertaining throughout. Some may argue that this was just a way to get Triple H another title reign but I think it was a great decision and a good first chapter to the story that is No Mercy 2007. **3/4

BRIAN KENDRICK/PAUL LONDON/JEFF HARDY vs. LANCE CADE/TREVOR MURDOCH/KEN KENNEDY
This is billed as a special bonus match. I’m intrigued. Tell me more about this “special bonus match”. Will there be anything on a pole? Kennedy announces himself per usual and gets some pretty decent heat before making his way down to the ring. It’s hard to pinpoint what went wrong for Kennedy in WWE. Sure, he was injury prone, but it almost seemed as if they stripped him of everything that made him a unique and interesting character by the end of his run. The heels isolate Kendrick for a long period of time until Kendrick finds an opening to make a comeback. He hits a flying DDT off the top rope onto Cade and dives into his corner to tag in Hardy. Hardy hits all of his signature moves followed by a SICK facebuster on Murdoch. He hits the Swanton on him but Cade breaks the count! The action is spilling to the outside of the ring as the pace picks up. Hardy and Kendrick climb to the top rope and fly to the outside, hitting Cade and Murdoch with splashes. London’s on the top rope about to follow suit, but gets caught with a Lambeau Leap from Kennedy. Kennedy gets the cover and that’s the match!

This was a quick and fun little match, though it was nothing to write home about. They did what they could with the eight minutes alloted. It was a good last minute addition to the card. **

Batista catches up with Triple H backstage and tells him it’s a lot easier to win the title than it is to keep it. Triple H wishes him luck in his Punjabi Prison match later on as Batista walks away. Triple H turns around and runs into Vince. Vince tells him that his match with Umaga later tonight is still going to happen and it’ll be for the championship.

ECW CHAMPIONSHIP: BIG DADDY V w/ MATT STRIKER vs. CM PUNK (c)
There’s not much of a match here. Big Daddy V dominates for a minute and hits the splash on Punk. Punk manages to escape and hits a missile dropkick from the top rope. Striker panics at the prospect of Punk winning and attacks him for the DQ in under two minutes.

I understand the finish to the match. I get why they did it. Big Daddy V wasn’t in a position to lose clean because he was getting the monster heel treatment and Punk couldn’t lose clean either because he was getting pushed. My solution? Don’t book the fucking match. Or do it on TV or something. Nobody was going to be like “Man, No Mercy looks pretty good, but I’m gonna have to pass. There’s no Big Daddy V”. 1/4*

PIZZA EATING CONTEST: MATT HARDY vs MVP
See, they could have scrapped the ECW match and given more time to this! Here’s the details: Taz is the host. Matt Hardy and MVP eat pizza. Matt Hardy pukes. After the match, Matt Hardy goes to IHOP and eats a stack of pancakes.

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP: TRIPLE H (c) vs. UMAGA
We get some brawling to start things off. Umaga no-sells a DDT. He runs at Triple H but gets thrown to the outside. Umaga slams Trip’s head into the steps and rolls him back to the inside. He goes to the top rope but misses a splash! Umaga fights back though and goes for the Samoan Spike. Triple H reverses, sets up the Pedigree, but THAT gets reversed into a back body drop! Here’s a general rule of thumb: If Triple H goes for a Pedigree within the first five minutes of a match, a back body drop is right around the corner. Triple H goes for another Pedigree but this time it gets reversed into a Samoan Drop! Umaga locks on the Bear Hug but Triple H breaks out of it. Umaga hits the Catatonic but it only gets a two count. I knew it’d be a two count but I still took the bait. He throws Trips into the corner and goes for his running ass splash but misses. Triple H gets up and hits the Pedigree for the victory!

This match wasn’t that good but it wasn’t bad. There was some decent psychology revolving around Triple H’s potential internal injuries and Umaga worked the midsection good. Sure they could have done more but in hindsight, the main event would have suffered if they went balls to the wall for twenty minutes. Despite losing in quick fashion, Umaga looked pretty good in defeat. Getting a substantial amount of offense on Triple H is always a good thing. **

FINLAY vs REY MYSTERIO
Rey starts off the match by targeting Finlay’s legs. He tries to give him a sunset powerbomb off the apron but Finlay wraps him up in the apron cover. I love how Finlay uses his surroundings to his advantage. I know that’s the general consensus but it needed to be said. He tosses Rey in and slides him across the ring shoulder first into the ring post! Finlay sees his opening and begins working over the shoulder. Rey tries to make a comeback but gets hit with a sick clothesline. Finlay continues to methodically pick Rey apart. Rey finally fights back and hits a high cross body for two. He comes off the top rope with a senton followed by a dropkick to the face for another two count! He goes for the 619 but Finlay sees it coming and hits another sick looking clothesline! Finlay grabs the shillelagh, but Mysterio ducks it and sends him back into the ropes for another failed 619 attempt. It was kind of a reverse 619 because Finlay was on the outside of the ring with his head hanging on the inside. Rey kicks him, jumps to the top rope and hits a big leg drop with Finlay still on the apron. Finlay falls straight back and his head just nails the floor. The ref puts up an “X” and medics begin tending to Finlay, who is unresponsive. Rey is in the ring looking remorseful. As they wheel Finlay to the back, he jumps off of the stretcher and starts beating the shit out of Rey. That’s awesome! He gives Rey a suplex onto the floor and a punt to the head and that’s that.

The match was going good until the non-finish. Non-finishes are never a good idea on Pay-Per-View, but damn if this wasn’t a good one. It really got over how much of a dick heel Finlay is and it continued the feud. It’s a shame he got strapped with Hornswoggle because he’s awesome as a heel. **1/2

Triple H is backstage licking his wounds as Vince McMahon walks in. Vince tells him that Orton has invoked his rematch clause and that the match will be tonight. Vince says that he always gives the fans what they want and that the match will be a Last Man Standing match. They’ve gone above and beyond to make up for the fact that Cena got injured.

WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP: BETH PHOENIX vs CANDICE MICHELLE (c)
Before the match starts, I’d like to get this out of the way. Dying Candice’s hair, remixing her entrance music, and turning on a bunch of strobe lights when she enters doesn’t make her a face. I feel like WWE always tries to create Trish Stratus v2 and it’ll never work because it feels so contrived. It’s really hard to care about diva storylines because all of the faces are friends and all of the heels are friends. If one of them turns, all prior feuds involving said diva are erased from history and she is welcomed into her new group of friends (that she had just been feuding with) with open arms. Anyways, Beth manhandles Candice to start and shoves her down. Candice gets a nasty looking roll up for two. Beth gets up and just starts beating the shit out of her again. Candice locks on the short arm scissors and Beth breaks out of that without much of problem. Candice goes upstairs and goes for a high cross body but Beth catches her and gives her a nice powerslam. Candice gets another roll up for two and the crowd’s not exactly on the edge of their seats for these nearfalls. She goes to the top rope again and hits the crossbody this time but only gets two. Beth quickly recovers and hits a backbreaker. She lifts Candice up and hits the cradle suplex for three. That was a little anti-climatic. She actually got a decent pop for the win though. After the match Beth grabs a microphone from the announce table and says that she is the most perfect being on the face of the Earth. We have entered a new era. The era of the Glamazon.

I wasn’t really a fan of Candice’s at this time but I have to give credit where credit’s due. Candice’s offense is basically comprised of a bunch of kick variations and a bunch of roll ups. It’s a limited moveset but she does all of it well. You can tell she was taking wrestling seriously and she had improved by leaps and bounds. Unfortunately, she still wasn’t very good and giving Beth Phoenix the title was the right decision. All in all, this was a pretty solid diva’s match. 3/4*

WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP PUNJABI PRISON MATCH: BATISTA (c) vs. THE GREAT KHALI
Okay, so the Punjabi Prison is basically two cages. They’re made of bamboo reinforced by steel apparently. The only way to win is to escape both cages. There are four doors on the inner cage. When a wrestler calls for a door to be opened, a ref will open the door but it will only stay open for sixty seconds. Once it closes it cannot be opened again. If you don’t escape by time all four doors are shut, you’re fucked because you have to climb over. After you escape the first cage you have to climb over the second, twenty foot high cage. According to Michael Cole, Khali has the home court advantage because, well you know, he grew up in a Punjabi Prison. I have to admit the structure is pretty impressive looking. Khali gets caught up in the ropes early on and Batista runs at him but gets a boot to the face. Khali calls for a door to be opened and Batista is trying to hold him on the inside. Sixty second elapse and the door is closed and padlocked shut. Khali is picking Batista apart at a slow methodical pace. He goes for a leg drop but Batista gets out of the way! Both men up and Khali gets speared! Batista calls for the door to be opened but Khali catches him. A minute passes and the second door is shut. Khali finds a leather strap and starts whipping Batista with it. He calls for the third door to be opened and Batista comes up from behind and catches him with a spinebuster. Both men are down and Batista is slowly crawling to the door. Khali grabs him by the leg at the last second and the third door is shut. Batista picks up the leather strap and begins returning the favor on Khali. Batista decides he’s going to climb over the top of the first structure but Khali catches him. Khali locks in the vice grip. At this point nobody had broken the vice grip. He’s wearing down Batista and calls for the door but Batista hits a low blow! There’s 35 seconds left and both men are down! Batista is half way out but Khali grabs the door and begins slamming it down on Batista. He pulls him back in and the final door is shut! It looks like they’re climbing. Batista is halfway up the cage and Khali pulls him down. Batista falls straight back and hits the ring with a big thud! Khali is over the first structure now. He begins climbing up the second structure as Batista climbs the first. Batista JUMPS from one structure to the other and now both men are at the top of the second structure. They’re climbing down the outside and Batista hits the floor first! GREAT finish!

Coming into this match, I was extremely skeptical. The Punjabi Prison is somewhat of a complex gimmick and I didn’t think these two men were capable of delivering within the confines of it. Surprisingly, not only did they put on a good match, but they worked the gimmick perfectly. They built great suspense with the door teases and the ending was superb. I don’t think these two could have put on a match this good without the gimmick actually. It did a good job of covering both men’s flaws. ***

Grisham is backstage with Triple H. Triple H says that if anybody thinks the game is over, he’s just getting started. He tells Randy Orton to get ready to get hurt. Fair enough warning.

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP LAST MAN STANDING MATCH: RANDY ORTON vs TRIPLE H (c)
It finally comes down to this. We’ve all been waiting for it. The match that’s been two hours in the making! After a brief stare down they begin exchanging blows. Orton quickly gets the advantage by targeting the ribs of Triple H. Triple H bails to the outside but Orton is staying on him. They brawl up to the ramp and Triple H goes for a Pedigree. Orton pushes him off and Triple H lands right on the steel. Orton slams Triple H’s back against the guard rail and then proceeds to the throw him into the steps. Orton rolls him into the ring, waits for him to stand up and then gives him a nice elevated dropkick. Triple H gets up at eight. Orton Irish whips him into the ropes but Triple H comes back with a knee to the face. Orton recovers quickly and hits his reverse backbreaker which gets a five count. Orton goes under the ring and grabs some cable. He chokes Triple H out with it and gets a nine count for that. Orton’s pulling the monitors off all of the announce tables and rolls Triple H onto one of them. He attempts to RKO Triple H from one announce table to the other but Triple H pushes him off and Orton goes straight through the ECW table! Orton BARELY makes it up at nine. Triple H hits a spinebuster on the outside and the count begins! He makes it up at nine again. Triple H picks up the ring stairs, runs at Orton and drives them into Orton’s skull! Wow, Orton didn’t even put his hands up for that. That was just brutal. Orton gets up at nine for the third time in a row. Triple H grabs a steel chair and follows Orton into the ring. Orton kicks him in the stomach and he drops the chair. Orton grabs him by the head and nails a DDT onto the chair! The ref is counting and both men are down. Both men make it to their feet by eight and Orton gets an adrenaline rush and beings pummeling Triple H in the corner. Orton sets up the chair and RKO’s him onto the chair! Triple H is busted open! Triple H uses the ropes to make it to his feet at 9. He gives Orton a crotch chop and Orton is in disbelief. Triple H falls back down again. Orton sets up for the punt and runs at him. Triple H catches his foot! Triple H clotheslines him and throws him over the top rope. He’s dragging Orton around the ring and throwing him into anything and everything. Triple H goes for a Pedigree on the outside but Orton catapults him into the ring post! Orton runs at Triple H with the steps in hand but Triple H catches him with a low blow! Orton falls face first onto the stairs and Triple H hits him over the head with a chair! Orton somehow gets up at nine and the match continues! Triple H rolls him onto the announce table and sets up for the Pedigree but Orton hits him with the RKO on it! It’s over! Orton’s the new champion!

This match was excellent. It had a great story going into it with Triple H’s rib injury and they worked it perfectly in the beginning of the match. It slowly got more violent and intense as time went on. This is a perfect example of how a match should progress. Last Man Standing matches have a tendency to seem disjointed at times because of the constant ten counts but these two did a great job of keeping it exciting. Both men came out of this match looking better than they did coming into it so kudos to everybody involved for that. ****

FINAL VERDICT: No Mercy 2007 is a mixed bag. It opened up with a bang but after that, the show was pretty underwhelming until the two main events. There was definitely a feeling that anything could happen due to Cena being injured and that added a lot of excitement, but unfortunately there was just too much filler in the midcard for me to give this a higher rating. Don’t go out and buy this DVD unless you see it on sale, but go out of your way to check out the Last Man Standing match online.
RATING: 6.0

One quick note before I get some much needed sleep: The polls aren’t closed yet. You can still vote for what I review tomorrow. The candidates are:

Vengeance 2006 (WWE)
Cyberslam 1999 (ECW)
Summerslam 2000 (WWE)

Vote, vote, vote! Or don’t. You should though. See you tomorrow!

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Posted by Mike Bagozzi on December 16th, 2010 :: Filed under Reviews,WWE
Tags :: No Mercy 2007, randy orton, triple h, wwe

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Son of a bitch. I guess this is what you get when you let people decide what you’re going to review. With one million votes (999,999 via private message), XPW Freefall is the DVD I’ll be reviewing today. No Mercy 2003 and Against All Odds 2006 go back into the shoebox and the next drawing will take place at the end of this review. You choose. I review. Actually, I should call this “YouChoose Reviews”. It has a nice ring to it. Does somebody else have that name? I’ll look into it. Google says no. I’m stalling. Let’s get this over with.

XPW FREEFALL

Warning Screen: XPW employs highly skilled wrestlers to perform complex and dangerous manuevers for it’s wrestling events. Any of the techniques and stunts executed on this tape should not be attempted by anyone, as doing so might cause permanent injury and/or death. We hope you enjoy this tape, but please leave the wrestling to the wrestlers. Thank you. -Xtreme Pro Wrestling-

*SNIDE REMARK OVERLOAD*

Kriss Kloss is going to be our host for this DVD. He runs down the card. I already bought the DVD, why is he trying to sell it to me?

XPW TV TITLE GAUNTLET: KAOS (c) W/ GQ MONEY vs. ANGEL
Kaos is wrestling with his belt on. We get some pretty solid chain wrestling to start which leads into a nice nearfall exchange. Angel goes upstairs but Kaos catches him and gives him a bodyslam. That only gets him two. I’m just going to say this and get it out of the way now. The announcing is terrible. It’s a complete abomination and detracts from every match. One of the announcers can barely grasp the English language. Gimmick or not, it’s terribly distracting. Kaos hits a Death Valley Driver for two. Angel hits him with a heel kick and Kaos rolls to the outside. GQ removes a lens from his glasses and throws it at Angel’s eye. Angel sells it for about two seconds before going to the top rope and hitting a plancha to the outside on Kaos. How old is Angel here? He looks about 17. He wrestles like a lightweight that just graduated from training. Kaos hits a pretty sick looking piledriver for the three. It looked pretty dangerous but these are highly skilled wrestlers so I’m not worried. Kaos had some pretty solid offence but there was literally nothing to this match. It was just a collection of mediocre spots. 1/2*

XPW TV TITLE GAUNTLET: KAOS (c) W/ GQ MONEY vs. CHRIS HAMRICK
They start off exchanging some uninspired armbars. Hamrick hits a few armdrags before the match cuts ahead. We rejoin them as Kaos is draped over the middle rope. Hamrick attempts a Bronco-Buster but Kaos moves and Hamrick lands on the concrete. Kaos dropkicks him off of the apron and Hamrick sommersaults on to the ground. Don’t get me wrong, that looked really cool but it was quite the oversell. We get some cookie cutter brawling on the outside that we’ve come to expect from this genre of wrestling. Kaos runs at him with a chair but Hamrick gives him a drop toe hold and Kaos goes face first into the chair on to the apron. With the chair leaning against Kaos’ head, Hamrick goes to the top rope. He jumps all the way across the ring but barely grazes the chair with a drop kick. Kaos sold the shit out of it and the crowd actually seemed to buy it so good for them. We cut forward again and Hamrick is still in control. He hits a legdrop off the top rope but only gets two. Hamrick hits a sloppy superplex off the top rope for another two. Hamrick hits a nice looking modified neckbreaker but GQ Money has the ref distracted. The ref is back in the ring as Hamrick goes upstairs. GQ trips him up and Kaos follows him to the top. He hits a sick looking brainbuster from the top rope and that’s all she wrote. This is hard to rate because it was chopped up but from what I saw it was a solid outing. Kaos impressed me in these two matches and for the record, his belt stayed on for the entire gauntlet. He plays a good heel and has some crisp offence. I can’t say the same for his opponents however. *1/2

Apparently the gauntlet had more than two matches in it. Kaos also wrestled Nosawa in what has been reported as a **** match by more than one source. This DVD has time constraints though and we had to make time for this:

XPW WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP: WEBB (c) vs. GQ MONEY
I don’t know why a scrawny manager is wrestling for a world title. I don’t know why Webb’s gimmick here involves him wrestling in a Karate uniform. The announcers don’t really do a good job of explaining this shit, so I’m left to ponder deeply. We start off with a little brawling before GQ begins hitting POWER MOVES on the much larger Webb. He looks like Scotty 2 Hotty on crack for the record. GQ hits a few sloppy looking top rope moves, including a very delayed axe handle that had Webb standing around for about ten seconds before finally getting hit. Webb regains control amongst a chorus of boring chants. He hits a few strikes and kicks before removing his karate uniform and transforming into his old gimmick/alter ego “White Trash” Johnny Webb. We get some more sloppy wrestling and a lot of boring chants before Webb chokes GQ out and puts me out of my misery. This was just a horrible match. GQ Money has no business being in a wrestling ring, let alone participating in a competitive match. DUD

We now cut to Supreme standing in the ring cutting a promo. He’s basically a fatter, less talented version of Tommy Dreamer. He’s the hardcore company man who stands up for good. Oh yeah, and he swears a lot. Like… every other word. So he’s in the ring swearing and then Sandman comes out and calls him a whore for the fans. Sandman gets a good line in: “You say you’re the king of the deathmatch but I haven’t seen anyone die around here lately”. He says he’s done using weapons because he doesn’t care about the fans. He’s a superstar and he can wrestle. Supreme swears more and then challenges him to a KOTDM title match. Sandman says no. Supreme calls him a pussy and Sandman eventually accepts. Sandman actually did a really good job playing the Hollywood heel here. It would never work in WWE or TNA but it fits perfectly in XPW.

KING OF THE DEATHMATCH CHAMPIONSHIP: SUPREME (c) vs. SANDMAN
There’s a barbed wire board in one corner, a bed of nails in the other corner, a bed of tacks in the ring, and plenty more on the outside. The match starts off pretty slow paced, with Sandman playing into his anti-hardcore gimmick. It works suprisingly well and actually creates some drama that a lot of deathmatches don’t have. A spot is nothing without a little build up to it. Supreme tosses Sandman into the bed of nails but Sandman rolls to the outside. Supreme follows him out and Sandman rolls back in. Supreme slides a bed of barbed wire into the ring and then rolls back in. Sandman delivers a few stiff kicks and tosses the barbed wire board back to the outside while Supreme is down. Supreme gets pissed off and launches him into the barbed wire board leaning in the corner. Sandman is caught up in it and Supreme stomps a mudhole in him. Supreme pulls him out of the barbed wire and drags him over to the bed of nails. He proceeds to grind his head against the nails. Sandman breaks free and rolls to the outside, Sandman’s busted open. Supreme rolls Sandman on to a barbed wire table on the outside and legdrops him through it. Supreme is caught up in the barbed wire and we get a clear shot of him blading. Sandman decides he’s hardcore again and brings in four chairs. Supreme knocks him over and, with the help of the ref, lays the bed of tacks atop the chairs. He lifts Sandman up and lays him on the bed of tacks. He goes upstairs for a splash but Kaos, GQ Money, and some other dude come out for the save. Sandman rolls off and they triple suplex Supreme on to the tacks. Sandman crawls on top of him and gets the three. Apparently Sandman has joined the Enterprise. Well, they had the right idea with the slow build to the spots, but they didn’t have nearly enough time for that approach to be effective. Therefore I wouldn’t have went with that approach at all. The ending was pretty weak too and didn’t do the match any favors. *

BUCK NAKED MATCH: VERONICA CAINE vs. LIZZY BORDEN
You have to strip your opponent to win. Rob Black is out and he bans the Enterprise from ringside. Thank God, I’ve seen enough GQ Money on this dvd to last me a lifetime. Rob Black makes this a lumberjack match and gives a bunch of jobbers paddles at ringside. If one of the girls gets thrown outside, they get spanked with paddles. Caine gets thrown out and everybody lightly taps her with the paddles. Lizzy Borden gets thrown outside but they don’t spank her with the paddles (because she’s the face and all). They’re rolling around ripping each others clothes off. Veronica Caine eventually gets stripped down to nothing but the lights go out and you can’t see anything. If anybody bought a ticket for that, they got fucked. XPW then admits it as a message pops up on the screen that says “THAT WAS BULLS*#T! THE LIVE AUDIENCE GOT SCREWED BUT XPW HOME VIDEO DELIVERS.” We then get a vignette of them doing really cheesy topless posing on a beach. Utter shit. N/R

FREEFALL SCAFFOLD MATCH: VIC GRIMES vs. NEW JACK
Okay, so there’s a huge elaborate, expensive looking scaffold that stands about fourty feet above the ring. In the ring is twelve tables. There are three rows of tables that are four tables high. New Jack and Vic Grimes basically spend about ten minutes brawling around ringside hitting each other with various weapons. New Jack and Vic Grimes are both cut open by pizza cutters. They exchange blows with rakes, wet floor signs, barbed wire bats, barbed wire whips, jugs of distilled water and other things that you probably shouldn’t find ringside at a wrestling show. They eventually make it to the top of the scaffold. They brawl for a bit before New Jack pulls out A STUNGUN. He shocks him and then HURLS HIM OFF THE SCAFFOLD. He throws him so far that Grimes almost misses the tables completely. Search Youtube for the spot if you’ve never seen it. Grimes basically grazed one of the tables and bounced off the top rope before landing hard in the ring. If that rope would have snapped, Vic could have died. New Jack later admitted in a shoot interview that he had beef with Vic Grimes over a spot gone wrong in ECW and wanted to kill him. He legitimately stunned the shit out of him before he threw him off the scaffold and when he threw him off, he wanted him to land on the outside. The match itself was a pile of shit. It was the most boring brawling imaginable for ten minutes before they headed up the scaffold for the big spot. The big spot didn’t disappoint though so I have to give them credit for that. *

FINAL VERDICT: This DVD is bad. The recap video at the end showed a cage match, Psychosis, and Juventud Guerrera. Why would they recap shit that they didn’t include on the DVD? One of the biggest issues I had with this DVD was that it focused far too much on getting over storylines and angles that most of the viewers probably aren’t familiar with. If you only have an hour to work with, focus on the wrestling. The announcing is horrible, the crowd was dead, the best match clocks in at *1/2, and there’s nothing outside of a single high spot that’s worth reccomending. Avoid. 2/10

Here we go. It’s time to pull three new pieces of paper from the shoebox. Don’t forget to leave a comment or send me a private message with your vote to determine which show I review next.

The choices are:
Vengeance 2006 (WWE)
Cyberslam 1999 (ECW)
Summerslam 2000 (WWE)

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Posted by Mike Bagozzi on December 2nd, 2010 :: Filed under Reviews
Tags :: Freefall, XPW

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Hello, my name is Mike Bagozzi. I’m going to be writing here until a major wrestling promotion catches wind of the hot new writer over at pwrestlingnews and hires me on the spot for six figures. I’ll stay humble, don’t worry. In the mean time, I’ll be doing DVD and tape reviews for the site. Not just any DVD or tape reviews though. NO! I’ll be reviewing what you choose.

I own, what I’d like to consider, a very large wrestling collection. I have assumed the task of writing down, onto small pieces of paper, every show/match collection I own. I then placed them into a shoebox. To start, I will pull out three pieces of paper at random. It’s then up to you, the reader, to comment below or message me and tell me which of the three you want to see reviewed. The winner gets reviewed, the two losers get put back into the box and three new pieces of paper will then be pulled from the shoebox and enter into the fray. In case of a tie (or my thousands of readers all go on vacation at the same time), I’ll choose one of the three at random. A little gimmick never hurt anybody right? Think of it as my version of Taboo Tuesday. What is Taboo Tuesday you ask? (Yay, my first contrived segue!) You ask, I review. Let’s do this.

WWE TABOO TUESDAY 2005

Taboo Tuesday was a great concept in theory. It was an interactive pay per view in which fans got to make the decisions. We decided match types. We decided who was going to wrestle who. We had the chance to impact the entire direction of the product by casting our votes at wwe.com. Or at least, that’s what they wanted us to think.

If I told you that you were going to die tomorrow, how would you want to die?

A) Eaten alive by a hungry group of cannibals.
B) Stabbed multiple times until you slowly bleed out.
C) In your sleep.

I’d pick C too. This was the entire problem with Taboo Tuesday. Sure they gave us choices, but they didn’t give us CHOICES. That’s not to say that the shows were bad though. On the contrary, Taboo Tuesday delivered some pretty memorable matches. Today I’ll be reviewing the second and last Taboo Tuesday, from 2005. In 2006 they changed the name to Cyber Sunday and, as the name indicates, moved the event to Sunday. The whole concept was eventually scrapped in 2009 for Bragging Rights.

In today’s world of gimmick pay per views, I feel that a concept like this has legs to stand on. Unfortunately WWE’s unwillingness to allow it’s fans too much control will forever cripple such an idea. Enough of my ranting though, lets get on to the review.

The opening match is scheduled to be Edge and Chris Masters representing Raw against a team of our choosing representing Smackdown. Todd Grisham is our pseudo host for tonight and will be announcing the poll results for us. Our choices are:

Christian (Heel)
Matt Hardy (Edge’s biggest rival)
Hardcore Holly (Heel)
JBL (Heel)
Rey Mysterio (Crowd favorite and hometown hero)

To everybody’s surprise, Rey Mysterio and Matt Hardy won the poll. It looks like I won’t be scratching Edge and Chris Masters vs JBL and Hardcore Holly off of my bucket list today. Lita grabs a microphone and announces that Edge won’t be competing tonight. He elaborates by saying that beating Hardy and Mysterio will do nothing to further his career and that he only cares about himself. It’s a typical heel promo but Edge is one of the best at them. He announces that his replacement will be Snitsky.

SNITSKY & CHRIS MASTERS vs. MATT HARDY & REY MYSTERIO
This is a Raw vs Smackdown match and for some reason there’s a Raw ref and a Smackdown ref both in the ring. It’s a bit of a distraction at first but it doesn’t take away from the match as it progresses. Masters and Snitsky take turns dismantling Rey to start things off. Mysterio quickly gets out of that mess and tags in Hardy who cleans house. Hardy takes Snitsky to the top rope and hits a SICK superplex. It was somewhat botched in that Snitsky landed head first like he was taking a DDT. That wasn’t his fault. The heels take control after awhile and use some pretty impressive power moves. Snitsky knocks Mysterio off the apron and manages to get himself some pretty big heel heat, Matt goes for a high cross body on Snitsky but gets caught. He manages to turn that into an inverted DDT! Mysterio’s in for the hot tag now and the crowd is into it as Rey hits all of his signature moves. He goes to hit a DDT off of the top rope but Snitsky tosses him and Rey lands right into the Masterlock! He pushes off the turnbuckles and turns it into a pin which leads to the ref’s arguing. Masters and Snitsky end up on the outside. Mysterio and Hardy both come from the top rope and hit splashes on them. Plenty of near falls happening now and you can feel the match climaxing. Rey hits a 619 on Masters and then Matt hits the Twist of Fate. Springboard Splash from the top rope by Mysterio and that’s all she wrote. This was classic tag formula here. Masters and Snitsky more than held their own and the result was a great opener. ***1/4

Backstage, Mick Foley gets a cheap pop from the crowd. His luggage got mixed up with Maria’s. She ends up taking off her clothes and tells Mick Foley to have a nice day. Ultimately this was a pointless yet fun little segment. If you have Mick in the building, you might as well use him a couple of times.

The next match is Rob Conway and Tomko against Eugene and a legend of our choosing. This was supposed to be a handicapped match until Bischoff threw Tomko into the mix. The choices are Duggan, Kamala, and Snuka. Snuka got 43%, beating Duggan by only 3%. Poor Kamala.

ROB CONWAY & TYSON TOMKO vs. EUGENE & JIMMY SNUKA
Eugene and Tomko start things off. We get some typical Eugene comedy antics until Tomko takes charge. Conway gets tagged in shortly after. I’ve never been a fan of Conway’s. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve never seen his OVW work, but what I have seen hasn’t set my world on fire. Ironically enough, I used to push Conway and Dinsmore in EWR six years ago before I had seen either of them wrestle. They had tag experience and pretty good stats! I suppose that’s only ironic to me though. Snuka gets the hot tag and hits some chops. He goes to the top rope and hits the splash on Conway for the pinfall. Tomko gets all mad and corners Snuka after the match. Kamala and Duggan run out and make the save. This is another example of our votes not mattering all that much. It didn’t matter who won the poll. The basic match structure would have been Eugene getting his ass kicked until the legend gets the hot tag and hits his finisher. It was a short and inoffensive match though and the crowd liked it. There’s always room on the card for a fun match like this. 1/2*

The next match is Carlito vs Mankind, Cactus Jack, or Dude Love. Mankind wins the poll with 50%. I was hoping for Cactus Jack but that probably wouldn’t have changed the match very much.

CARLITO vs. MANKIND
We get a video package wrapping up the Carlito/Foley feud before the match. Perhaps to give Foley some time to get in proper attire? We start off with some brawling before the match spills to the outside. Foley hits a neck breaker and then grabs a chair. He runs at Carlito but Carlito gets him with the drop toe hold and Foley goes face first into the chair… into the steps! That was pretty cool. Mick gets up and then gets drop kicked head first into the stairs! Carlito rolls him into the ring for a near fall. We get a double clothesline and the ten count begins. Mick sits up, rips out his hair and gets back on offense. He clotheslines Carlito to the outside and then gives him an elbow drop off of the apron. Foley gives him Mr. Socko (with a fro on it for this particular occasion) and the ref rings the bell. Well that was anti-climatic. Foley gave us all of his signature spots and put his body on the line as usual but it just wasn’t enough. Carlito could have done a lot more with this opportunity. He was lacking aggression, a problem that plagued his career in the WWE. It was fine for what it was, but it seemed like they were merely going through the motions at times. **

Backstage, Bischoff is on the phone bitching about having to deal with Teddy Long when Vince McMahon walks in. Vince rubs it into Bischoff’s face that Raw lost the tag match and tells him that he’s on his own. Vince isn’t bailing him out of anything. He tells Bischoff that he needs to take control and be the man that almost put Vince out of business back in the 90′s. Before walking out, Vince wishes Bischoff luck in the other Raw vs Smackdown match on the show, Batista vs Coach.

We head over to Grisham now, who is about to reveal the third participant in our main event of the evening. The choices are Kane, Big Show and Shawn Michaels. Shawn Michaels wins the vote and heads into a world title match against Cena and Angle later on, while Big Show and Kane have to team up for the Tag Team Championships up next.

TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: BIG SHOW & KANE vs. CADE & MURDOCH (c)
I’m not looking forward to this match very much. Kane starts off against Murdoch and dominates to start. Murdoch manages to gain control and tags in Cade who ends up succombing to Kane’s offense. Kane tags in Show who gives Cade the “Shhh chop”. It’s cookie cutter back and forth action for a few minutes until Kane goes to the top rope. He’s about to deliver a clothesline to Cade but Murdoch comes from behind and pushes him to the outside. Kane gets hit with the Sweet and Sour on the floor and now the tides have changed. Kane gets rolled into the ring and Cade and Murdoch isolate him for awhile. They Irish whip him into the ropes for a double back body drop but Kane catches them with a couple of right hands. Big Show gets tagged in and splashes Cade in the corner. In a minor bit of poetic justice, Kane gets to hit his clothesline off of the top rope onto Murdoch. Double chokeslam to Cade and the match is over. Grisham attempts to interview Big Show and Kane after their win but Murdoch interrupts. That results in a double chokeslam. This match had a lot working against it. There was no build and both teams work better against smaller opponents so the match was plodding most of the time. It wasn’t too long though and nothing was actively bad about it. For the record, the faces are 4-0 tonight. *

Vader and Goldust are backstage. Coach tells them that they better be ready. Coach gives them a little pep talk. He says that he’s going to become WWE Champion and to be honest with you, I’m all for it. Okay, I’m not, but I love me some heel Coach.

Grisham brings out the divas dressed in robes for the Fulfill Your Fantasy Diva Battle Royal. We have Maria, Candice, Ashley, Victoria, Mickie James, and Trish Stratus. The WWE audience gets to decide if they’re wearing lingerie, leather and lace, or cheerleader outfits. Lingerie wins with 43%. They head to the back to get dressed in lingerie.

Up next is Batista against Coach with Vader and Goldust in his corner. It’s going to be a verbal debate, an arm wrestling contest, or a street fight. I think a verbal debate could make for some good TV but something tells me that’s not what the fans voted for. Street fight wins with 91%.

STREET FIGHT: BATISTA vs. JONATHON COACHMAN W/ VADER & GOLDUST
Coach’s shirt reads “I am the voice of the people”. Since this is a street fight, Goldust and Vader can get in on the action. Coach is on the outside of the ring as the two of them start the match off with Batista. Goldust and Vader have Batista cornered while Coach talks shit from the outside. Batista’s fighting them off rather quickly. Coach runs in, gets punched, and rolls to the outside. Goldust comes in with a kendo stick and a beat down ensues. Coach is whipping Batista with his belt as Goldust and Vader hold him down. Batista fights them off and gets posession of the belt. He gives all three of them a good whipping. Joey Styles chimes in with a classic line: “Batista is doing to Coach, what Coach does to play by play every night”. Batista Bomb on Coach for the win! 5-0 for the faces tonight! This was another quick inoffensive match. Again, there was nothing wrong with it. It wasn’t a technical masterpiece but it wasn’t meant to be. Like the previous matches it kept the crowd happy. 3/4*

Todd Grisham is backstage with Shawn Michaels. HBK says it’s great to be voted into the main event of Taboo Tuesday for the second year in a row. He says he’s going to go out there and do what he does best. Angle interrupts and says “I don’t like you and you don’t like me”. There’s one thing they can agree on though. Neither of them want Cena leaving with the gold. Angle wants to take Cena out and see which one of them is the best in the WWE is. They’re 1-1 and the rubber match went to a draw. Michaels says he’ll think about it.

WOMENS CHAMPIONSHIP: FULFILL YOUR FANTASY BATTLE ROYAL
Before this starts, I just want to say that I’m okay with sports entertainment-esque matches like this. Besides the opener though, the entire card has been sports entertainment filler! I guess that’s why they stopped the brand exclusive pay per views. Another gripe too, this match, under NO circumstances, should be for the title. With all of that aside though, all of the girls are looking good in their lingerie. I’m liking Ashley the most tonight. The bell rings and they all start brawling with each other. Mickie James saves Trish from getting eliminated by Victoria. Maria’s the first diva eliminated by a group of girls. Ashley knocks Candice off of the apron while Candice is taunting to the crowd. Victoria hits a tilt-a-whirl side slam on Trish and Mickie James runs at Victoria to help Trish. Mickie James’ character was great in 2005. I loved the whole angle with Trish. It was everything Tori/Sable should have been. Victoria catapults Ashley to the outside. It’s down to Victoria, Mickie and Trish. Mickie saves Trish from elimination again. Mickie spears Victoria through the ropes, sacrificing herself and giving Trish the win. Todd tries to interview Trish but Mickie grabbed the mike from him and started talking about how Trish was the greatest wrestler ever and said that she “totally owned Victoria”. She goes on and on about Trish until Trish’s music plays and cuts her off. I hate to sound like a broken record but it was a quick and inoffensive match. Once the match came down to Victoria, Trish, and Mickie things got pretty interesting. The match also did a good job of advancing the Trish/Mickie storyline. 3/4*

Up next we have Ric Flair vs Triple H in a singles match, a submission match or a cage match. If a cage match wasn’t a foregone conclusion enough, WWE had Ric Flair begging the audience to vote for a cage match in the weeks leading up to the event. The cage match wins with 83% of the votes. Predictable or not, this is going to be awesome.

INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP STEEL CAGE MATCH: TRIPLE H vs. RIC FLAIR (c)
The build up to this match was just superb and it’s adding to the atmosphere. You can feel the tension in the air for this one. The bell rings and we’re starting with a stare down. Flair tells Trips to give him his best shot. The two start with some back and forth brawling. Triple H is the first to get control of the match and begins methodically picking apart Flair. Styles says that Flair is the underdog and that “you can’t fight Father Time”. Huh? I thought Triple H was doing that right now. Ric Flair is the first to taste the steel as Triple H throws him face first into it. Flair’s already bleeding! Is that some sort of record? Triple H is now working over the wound on Flair’s head by raking it across the cage and dropping his knee on it. Triple H is punching Flair right in the face and this has become a brutal assault. Triple H starts to climb the cage but Flair catches him. They’re both standing on the top rope and Flair is chopping the hell out of him! Both men fall crotch first on the top rope. Triple H gets up and pulls a piece of chain off of the top of the cage. Apparently it’s part of the structure, but something tells me that this cage isn’t going to collapse without it. Instead of climbing over the top he comes down on Flair with a chain wrapped fist. Flair gets his foot up and Triple H gets a boot in the face! Flair goes for the Figure Four but Triple H punches him with the chain. The ref takes the chain away which is kind of bullshit considering there’s no DQ’s in a steel cage match. Triple H continues pummeling Flair as he lays prone on the ground. Flair’s bleeding all over the place. Triple H mocks Flair with the strut which receives a chorus of boo’s from the crowd. Triple H puts Flair in the Figure Four. Flair reverses it but Triple H gets to the ropes before Flair can do any damage. Triple H attempts to put the Figure Four on Flair again but gets kicked into the cage! He’s busted open now. Flair jumps on him and starts biting the wound! Flair’s coming back with lefts and rights. This is great. These two are just beating the hell out of each other. Flair begins working on Triple H’s left leg. Joey reminds us that it’s the leg Triple H injured in 2001. After working it over for a bit, Flair locks on the Figure Four. Flair’s about to escape but see’s Triple H coming up behind him so he comes from the top rope with a fist. He gives H a low blow and is about to crawl out of the door but Triple H pulls him back in. Flair has a chair though and Triple H gets back body dropped on to it! Flair hits Triple H with the chair over and over relentlessly. He falls to his knees and crawls out of the cage for the win! This was a classic old school style cage match. It had the psychology, the timing, and the pace to make it a great match. My only complaint was the ending. I think Flair should have gotten a decisive pin or submission victory. ****

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP: JOHN CENA (c) vs. KURT ANGLE vs. SHAWN MICHAELS
It’s time for the main event. Angle throws Michaels out of the ring and starts beating on Cena. So much for that alliance. Plenty of near falls to start. These three aren’t holding back. Angle gets back body dropped to the outside and we get some Michaels/Cena action. Angle gets back in the ring and starts dealing out suplexes left and right. We’re only a couple minutes in and all three of these guys are trying to hit their finishers. Michaels and Angle finally decide to join forces and beat Cena down. They toss Cena shoulder first into the ring post and Cena rolls to the outside. Michaels and Angle put Cena through the announce table and immediately start brawling. Michaels and Angle are going at it in the ring as the crowd chants for Cena to recover. Michaels gets Angle grounded and goes upstairs but Angle gets up and hits the Angle Slam from the top. Cena runs in and attacks the both of them. He goes for the five knuckle shuffle on Michaels but Angle pulls him to the outside. Michaels gets up and launches himself over the top rope onto Angle! All three men get back into the ring and Angle belly to belly suplexes Michaels over the top rope! Cena gets Angle down and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Angle reverses the STFU into the Ankle Lock! Cena tries crawling to the rope but Angle grapevines the leg! Michaels is climbing the top rope and he elbow drops Angle to break the hold! Angle gets Sweet Chin Music! Michaels gets the FU! IT’S OVER! Cena wins! This match was nonstop from start to finish. Angle and Michaels did a good job covering Cena’s lack of experience at this point in his career and the match turned out great. ***3/4

FINAL VERDICT: This is a hard show to rate. It started hot with a great opener and ended on two extremely high notes. While the midcard matches were nothing to drool over, it was all fun stuff. The faces went over in every match (I can’t remember that ever happening before) and the crowd went home happy. My only complaint would have to be the tag title match. It was pretty boring at times. That’s a minor quibble though. I have to say that I would recommend purchasing this show if you can find it or at the very least, check out the two main events. 7.0/10

What will I review next? That’s up to you. The nominees are:
WWE No Mercy 2003
XPW Freefall (Please don’t make me watch this.)
TNA Against All Odds 2006
Comment below with your vote!

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Posted by Mike Bagozzi on November 29th, 2010 :: Filed under Reviews,WWE
Tags :: cyber sunday, john cena, kurt angle, shawn michaels, taboo tuesday, wwe

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