Elimination Chamber 2010 Review
Posted on Feb 21, 2010 by Mike Shannon
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WWE Elimination Chamber 2010 (February 21, 2010)
-So, I have come fully prepared for the night: I have the USA-Canada hockey game on one TV (BOOOO Crosby...the ONLY time you will ever hear me say that), a good supply of caffeine, and a fire going in the background.
-LIVE from St. Louis, MO (home of some stupid arch thing)
Elimination Chamber for the WWE Championship
John Cena vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Randy Orton vs. HHH vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Sheamus
Big hometown pop for Orton. Kofi and Sheamus start and the former Jamaican gets a pair of near falls and then works the arm for another two. Sheamus has enough and takes over with his punchy-kicky stuff and puts Kofi down with an elbow. The champ tries to send Kofi to the steel but Kingston hits a high cross body for two. Sheamus takes back control with some bland offense while the crowd gets on Cena and cheers Orton until Sheamus finally hits his backbreaker for two.
HHH enters the match with a huge smile on his face and the crowd approves. They do the STAREDOWN OF DOOM and Sheamus slugs away but takes the high knee and kneedrop combo for two. Clothesline gets another two for Hunter and Sheamus is the first to taste the steel and , as JR would say, YOU KNOW IT DOESN'T TASTE GOOD! Sheamus recovers and tries the Razor's Edge, but HHH counters with a DDT for two. Kofi finally peels himself off the mat and cleans house on everyone in impressive fashion and actually launches himself over the top rope and hits the Boom Drop on HHH on the steel. Ouch.
Sheamus takes over on Kofi while the countdown starts again and crowd favorite Randy Orton joins us and kicks everyone's ass. He tosses Sheamus into the chamber wall a few times and then HHH gets thrown into the chain as well. Out of nowhere, Kofi comes flying off the top and takes out everyone. He tries another dive on Orton inside the ring, but gets dropkicked in mid-air for two. Orton catches HHH with a powerslam and tries the RKO but Hunter forces his way out of. Randy doesn't panic and calmly tosses Kofi and Hunter to the steel. Sheamus returns and rams Orton to the ring post for the double KO as Ted DiBiase enters the match and hammers away on HHH with the CLASSIC fistdrops.
Ted does the staredown with Orton and DiBiase decides to help Orton off the mat and join forces against everyone. In a sick spot, they actually force Kofi's head through the cage and choke him out, but then DiBiase adds a Boston crab because he's EVIL. HHH is the next to suffer the Legacy double team, getting hit with the Hangman's DDT ON THE STEEL FLOOR. THESE are heels, ladies and gentlemen. Legacy face down John Cena as his clock ticks down...
Cena fights his way out of his pod and beats the hell out of Legacy with his usual moveset. Attitude Adjustment on DiBiase and he DUMPS him to the steel in a painful spot. Orton recovers and tries a DDT on the outside, but Cena sends him into the steel and locks the STF on DiBiase, which looks to end his night but Orton saves with his neckbreaker. Orton looks to finish with the RKO but Cody Rhodes distracts him by handing DiBiase a lead pipe. Cena takes advantage and lifts up Orton in the AA and DiBiase just WAFFLES Orton with the pipe and then KOs Cena. DiBiase looks at them both and PINS ORTON!! Randy Orton is eliminated. Cody is so gonna die tomorrow.
Kofi takes out Sheamus and hits Trouble in Paradise for the pin on Ted. Ted DiBiase is eliminated That's kind of anti-climatic after all that gaga with Orton. Sheamus is next to recover and hits the Razor's Edge on Kofi to end his night as well. Kofi Kingston has been eliminated Sheamus goes to work on Cena with a kneelift and backbreaker before adding a powerslam for two. Sheamus hangs Cena in the Tree of Woe and then tries the Razor's Edge from the top rope, but Hunter returns with authority and hits a Pedigree on the champion which GETS THE PIN. Sheamus has been eliminated Cena recovers from the double KO first and quickly locks on the STF in the middle of the ring. Hunter fights it for as long as he can but finally, and very weakly, taps out to give Cena the title. HHH has been eliminated
Winner and NEW Champion: John Cena
-I was really digging the Orton-DiBiase stuff and thought they might try and at least put DiBiase in the final two, but twas not to be. Great match but they rushed the ending, although it was still very solid ****. The fact that John Cena is an 8-time World Champion makes me throw up in my mouth a little.
-Suddenly, Vince McMahon appears and books a Cena title defense RIGHT NOW!
WWE Title Match
John Cena vs. Batista
Cena makes the mistake of punching Batista in the face, which Big Dave REALLY doesn't like, so he spears the shit out of him and hits the Batista Bomb for the win.
Winner and NEW Champion: Batista
-DUD of course. Lawler acting like Cena won't go to WrestleMania is what makes me hate him as an announcer. I hope they don't think they need the title involved to make Bret/Cena vs. Vince/Dave to work, because they don't.
-Recap of the whole Bret Hart leg saga on Monday night.
Intercontinental Title
Drew MacIntyre vs. Kane
Lawler asks if Drew had a a charisma bypass in a shoot comment that wasn't supposed to be a shoot comment. Kane slugs away and they job around for awhile, doing nothing really exciting, and Kane hits a swinging neckbreaker for two. More TV match style offense until McIntyre goes to the knees and then switches back to the arm. Rookie. He works the arm with a resthold while Lawler makes fun of Matt Striker for suggesting Kane will submit to it. Kane escapes by dumping Drew to the floor but MacIntyre hits a short-arm DDT and goes back to the armbar. Kane backdrops out of the underhook DDT and he makes the comeback with the clothesline from the top. MacIntyre escapes the chokeslam attempt by going to the apron, where he is booted to the floor. Drew tastes the ring steps and gets tosses back inside, where Kane continues the beatdown. MacIntyre tries to run away but Kane sends him into the ring barrier then back in the ring. The referee tries to break them up against the ropes so Drew goes to the eyes and hits the Future Shock for the win.
Winner and STILL Champion: Drew MacIntyre
-I haven't seen much of him, but MacIntyre doesn't excite me very much **. Crowd could have given a shit less about this.
-Backstage, Maryse pretends to still be Gail Kim's friend but Gail reveals she speaks French and knows Maryse is one big meanie. This match is a piss break waiting to happen.
Divas Championship
Maryse vs. Gail Kim
Vickie Guerrero appears on the entranceway and stands up for the Smackdown divas, then changes the title match to...
Maryse & Gail Kim vs. Layla & Michelle McCool
I don't care who wrestles, just get it over with. Gail dominates Layla to start but gets rolled up for two, but Layla gets a little eager on a charge to the corner and also gets rolled up for two. Gail looks for the missile dropkick but Maryse distracts the referee, allowing for a McCool cheapshot to turn the tide. Michelle and her manly voice come in with a resthold (SMELL THE WORKRATE) but gets caught with her head down and Gail looks to tag but, of course, her partner shoves her into McCool who hits the Styles Clash for the win.
Winners: Michelle McCool & Layla
-Predictable and uninteresting, which gets *1/2. Maryse lays Gail out with a DDT as the crowd goes apathetic.
Redeeming quality
-We get a NXT promo and the Miz defends his mentoring of Daniel Bryan, which might be the most uncreative ring name I've ever heard. MVP interrupts and announces he is getting a rematch tonight against Miz for the US title. What the hell is going on? They sold this card for WEEKS and they basically change the ENTIRE thing once the PPV is on the air. I am stunned by this promotion sometimes.
-William Regal comes out to promote NXT and fights that “What?” bullshit again. It's not even annoying anymore, it's almost criminal. He starts to lecture the crowd about manners and Edge interrupts and announces he will decide what champion to face tomorrow on Raw. Then he lays out Regal for no real reason. Are they just wasting time at this point?
US Title
The Miz vs. MVP
MVP dominates to start with kneelifts and a judo throw puts Miz on the floor. MVP stays in control on the floor and gets two back inside, but Miz takes over and stomps away. MVP comes back with a forearm for two and then goes to a resthold. Miz comes back with an innovative jawbreaker out of the corner for two and chokes MVP out on the ropes. MVP catches him with a small package for two but gets floored with a boot to the face. Miz gets cocky on the cover and gets cradled for two before flooring MVP again. I am so over this feud. MVP fights out of a resthold with an electric chair drop for two but Miz hits a DDT for two. Miz stays in control by stomping away but gets crotched on the top and tossed off with a belly to belly for two. MVP makes the comeback as Miz is bleeding from a headbutt and the Ballin Elbow gets two. That move has never pinned anyone and never should. Big Show sends Mark Henry crashing through the ringside barrier to give us our highspot of the match and, after some jobbing around, Miz controls the referee and Big Show hits the KO Punch and Miz retains.
Winner and STILL Champion: The Miz
-Can we please end this endless feud already? MVP is not over and I'm bored with it **1/2.
-Recap of the earlier Elimination Chamber to waste MORE time.
-USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!
Elimination Chamber for the World Heavyweight Title
Rey Mysterio vs. John Morrison vs. Chris Jericho vs. Undertaker vs. CM Punk vs. R-Truth
CM Punk quotes “Watchmen” with the great line of “I'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with me!” Punk starts with R-Truth and gets two off a back suplex but Truth does the splits to avoid a clothesline and sends Punk to the steel. Truth uses a slingshot to catapult Punk into the cage the comes off the top with a 360 senton. Back in the ring, they exchange finisher attempts with Punk getting the best of it and hits the Go To Sleep to eliminate Truth. R-Truth has been eliminated Punk uses the extra time to preach about the evils of the Undertaker.
Rey Mysterio finally comes in and cleans house on Punk but tries for the 619 too early and gets caught with a powerslam for a near fall. He tries the GTS but it's still too early and Rey rolls him up for two. They go to the steel where Rey tries a hurricanrana but Punk holds on and swings Mysterio like a baseball bat against the cage. Back inside, he sends Rey HARD into one of the pods but it only gets two. They fight up the corner and then up on top of one of the pods where Punk tries a GTS but Rey ends up bringing him down from the top with a hurricanrana. He rolls Punk back inside and hits a springboard splash for the pin. CM Punk has been eliminated
Chris Jericho is next on the list and they do a nice little sequence that ends with a clothesline for two. A high flapjack leads to Jericho trying and missing the Lionsault, but Rey hits a 619. Jericho rolls to the steel, forcing Rey to follow him with a Spiderman leap to the cage and Chris drags him to the steel hard. Splash from the ropes gets two for Jericho and he chokes out Rey on the middle rope. Mysterio comes back with a moonsault for two and manages to get a guillotine choke (mistakenly called a Dragon sleeper by Striker) but Jericho breaks it and locks on the Walls of Jericho.
John Morrison enters the match and saves Rey Mysterio, which makes no sense, and then beats up everyone anyways. Morrison catches Rey with a kick on a springboard but gets rolled up by Jericho for two. Rey returns and dumps Morrison into the cage and then Jericho backdrops him onto the steel as Rey continues to take a good deal of punishment. Morrison rejoins us by taking out both guys with a flying clothesline and getting a standing shooting star for two on Rey. Mysterio comes back and sets him up for the 619 but Jericho runs in and catches him with the airplane spin backbreaker for two. Morrison takes out Jericho with a kick and hits Mysterio with Starship Pain to end his run. Rey Mysterio has been eliminated
Morrison stares down Mysterio for some reason and that allows Jericho to trip him up and lock on the Walls of Jericho as the clock ticks down and Undertaker enters to beat the hell out of Jericho. He clotheslines Morrison to the steel and gets two on Jericho after a legdrop. Double chokeslam attempt but Taker suffers a suplex instead. They team up to take UT to the steel and Morrison gets two on Jericho. Y2J takes out Morrison outside the ring but makes the mistake of slapping the Undertaker, when Taker wakes up Jericho tries to hide in a pod but it becomes an ass kicking playground instead. Note to self: Do NOT slap the Undertaker.
With Jericho's ass rightly kicked, Taker goes to work on Morrison with Snake Eyes but takes a STIFF spinning heel kick, but Morrison injures his ankle. He hobbles and tries Starship Pain but it only hits knees and Taker is still pissed. Jericho again cowers inside a pod as Taker beats down Morrison against the cage. Taker tries to use Morrison as a battering ram to get into the pod Jericho is hiding in and then decides to give John the Last Ride, but Jericho takes that opportunity to attack and send UT hard into a pod.
Morrison hits a knee on Jericho and gets a near fall but Taker returns and chokeslams the shit out of Morrison on the steel. DAMN. That gets the pin on Morrison. John Morrison has been eliminated And now...THE STRAPS COME DOWN~! After a staredown, Jericho charges and gets his ass kicked but manages to move out of the way of a charge to the corner. Superplex gets two for Jericho and he hammers away. Taker almost catches him with Hell's Gate but Y2J fights it off and turns him over in the Walls of Jericho and UT struggles. Finally, Undertaker powers out and tries Hell's Gate again, but Jericho uses the ropes to escape one more time. Taker tries a Tombstone, but Jericho flips out and hits a Codebreaker but it only gets two.
Jericho slugs away in the corner but makes the mistake of climbing the second rope and Taker walks out and hits him with the Last Ride. Undertaker looks to finish but suddenly Shawn Michaels pops up from under the steel platform and hits Taker with Sweet Chin Music and watches in silence as Chris Jericho gets the pin. Undertaker has been eliminated
Winner and NEW Champion: Chris Jericho
-A very hard-hitting, stiffly worked match that was better booked than the first one and left us with a surprise champion. Although there wasn't a clean finish, I'm still going higher than the first match ****1/4.
Final Word
As a two match show, this one was terrific but the middle portion was really boring with a meaningless women's match and a US title match that we've seen 300 times before. You really can't complain about 2 **** matches on one show, so I won't, but I'll advise you to fast forward through everything else.
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